Pain in the Ass: Parlamentarisk Sodomi Thinks We’re All the Butt of the Joke

Knowing full well that correlation does not equal causation and all that deductive reasoning shit, I think one man Norwegian grind band Parlamentarisk Sodomi (Papirmollen to his mom) just royally fucked up my 401(k).
Mollen and I have been having a running email convo since he first hit me up about reviewing Parlamentarisk’s debut full length, Har Du Sagt "A" Får Du Si "Nal,” a couple months ago. And turns out, in addition to his quixotic quest to make Norwegian Prime Minister Jens Stolentenberg’s life that much kinkier, like –oh – everyone else in the world, he has a rather jaundiced view of America as well. Which means he’s probably cheering our economic downturn as we speak. But let’s let the man himself explain it in his own uniquely verbose way as he spouts off about dumb Americans, deviate sex practices, spoiled Norwegians, banjoes in grind and shitty anarcho-punk bands:
“Yes, that's USAmerica for you - you and your draconian feudal overlords + brainsmashed submissive TV slaves of Republicity. There's absolutely, absolutely no hope for USAmerica - might as well shut down and bury the entire ‘civilization’ immediately, because the potential for total chaos and anarchy is long gone (if it ever existed?). An analogy: For instance, there's no chance in hell - impossible to have a reasonable discussion, not even in a ‘subhuman,’ neanderthal (grunts, stones + clubs) fashion with say the webmaster of godhatesfags.com. They are insane - forget them, fuck them. But take for instance someone, say a grindcore person you meet at a vegan coffee shop who for the very, very first time just used the term ‘gay’ to describe the sub-standard quality of your band, there might be a chance of debate - you win the debate and they regret the idiot choice of words and withdraw their horrible homophobesque comment. This metaphor at work / the next logical step: fuck the USAmerica - and Stoltenberg is full of wank though relatively ‘left,’ so let him die.”
Seriously, this guy does manage to pare his thoughts down to some pretty sweet 90 second bursts of grind. Really. I swear. But given that those 90 seconds are cloaked in Norwegian, I asked Mollen to expound on his lyrical philosophy for those of us who are too lazy to bust out the Google. His response, naturally, was Pynchon-esquely wordy.
“I actually translated all the lyrics for the debut full length, but they didn't fit into the booklet, those fuckers,” he said. “The lyrics deal with the clammy, eager hands who tamper with our freedom, the abused dirtied rags that are the remains of ‘justice;’ ‘Endless’ demands of the resignation of politicians, encouragement of flag burning, total protest, system hate, condemnation of oppression, ignorant brainwashed robots, the reckless fox we set to keep the geese of democracy, how the chase for profit kills and destroys children and the environment, electronic Big Brother 2084 style surveillance through computers, symbolic sexual descriptions of revolutionary orgies, economical collapse + chaos, our leaders' ideological adultery, constructive blasphemy, the whirlwindesque suffering that will take place during armageddon whenever that will be, total hate against nuclear weapons, crushing the lying parliament, anarchist semen, insulting the state church, puking because of politicians, hating patriotism, generally lots of metaphors of how horrid the system stinks - the politician/citizen buggering happens both ways, though it's almost always the guy in the street who gets fucked - well at least until now! And these are just the subjects for the debut album – tons of brand new topics will be discussed on the forthcoming second full length. Plenty of education. People are too brainwashed and ignorant because of the propaganda of the system. I don't really have an agenda for kinkification and perversification of the planet (that would come as a total bonus) – it's mostly a metaphor for how the system has no fucking balls, no spunk, it's all flat out soulless, filthy and full of lies.”
While Norway is known around the world for its active metal scene, it’s made more of a name for itself because of black capes and church burnings than it has for blastbeats and political dissent. Given the country’s reputation for lending material support to just about any artistic endeavor you care to name, it’s odd we’re not hearing more grind out Norway, especially given the phenomenal output of easterly neighbor Sweden.
“Absolutely every other country on earth has massive grind scenes, but it would be pointless here,” Mollen said.” Even if the Norwegian grindcore ‘scene’ was just one single person, (s)he could still get the municipality or hundreds of organizations to pay the necessary funds to set up a gig or festival, buy a guitar or record an album. The less popular the style of music, the easier it is to get subsidies. You can wear offensive shirts anywhere you want without needing ‘grind friends’ to help you avoid getting beat up. In other countries grind people seem to be 100% broke and get their asses kicked constantly, but never ever here. Norway = a spoiled, wealthy, ignorant, arrogant shit nation. Of course a big grindcore scene would come in handy if you need to borrow a guitar pick or a beer, but those things can be found around all kinds of musicians. So what's the fucking use? (Other than making it easy to find local grind idiots to do useless guest vocals on your shitty split 7" with Agathocles? >;) j/k) In Sweden (maybe Finland too?) the school system forces kids to play instruments from [when] they're extremely young, so naturally they have more grind bands there, more bossa nova, more of any genre.”
While grind may not be Norway’s signature sound, Mollen has adopted the isolationist ethic that has been a side effect of that nation’s black metal obsession. Though that was more matter of necessity than choice.
“Getting a full live line up would be cool, but it would have to be anarchy with no leaders + followers type of feudalism – so it would probably be a disaster. Everyone would have to get their say, which would inevitably lead to compromises, with some banjo here and there, hour long soundscapes/pad solos and a pop-punk snare drum,” Mollen said. “Anarchy is god, but for a band it means endless egalitarianism + freedom for each separate individual and the watered-down result is not uncompromising (that's why almost all anarcho-bands really suck!) But yeah, I'd love to do it some day if I find a willing drummer who can match the studio stuff.”