Grindcore Bracketology 3: The King of the World

Anybody else barely sleep last night, giddy with anticipation? It's like Christmas and the Oscars and the NHL trading deadline all rolled into one! It's the most important day of the grindcore calendar. Right? ... crickets.
Ok. Moving on.
We're about to crown the best grindcore record in history with two of the genre defining records vying for the honor. But first, let's take a quick trip back to see how the standings broke down so far.

32. Unseen Terror-Human Error 
31.Cellgraft-External Habitation (tie)
31. Sakatat-Bir Devrin Sonu (tie)
31. S.O.B.-Gate of Doom (tie)
28. Liberteer-Better to Die on Your Feet Than Live on Your Knees
27. Enemy Soil-Casualties of Progress (tie)
27. Mortalized-Absolute Mortality 2 (tie)
25. Extreme Noise Terror-A Holocaust in Your Head (tie)
25. S.O.B.-Don't Be Swindle (tie)
23. Agoraphobic Nosebleed-PCP Torpedo
22. Nasum-Helvete (tie)
22. Carcass-Reek of Putrefaction (tie)
20. Siege-Drop Dead (tie)
20. Agoraphobic Nosebleed-Altered States of America (tie)
20. Suffering Mind-Suffering Mind (tie)
17. Napalm Death-From Enslavement to Obliteration
16. Dephosphorus-Night Sky Transform
15. Kill the Client-Cleptocracy
14. GridLink-Amber Gray
13. Disrupt-Unrest
12. Brutal Truth-Extreme Conditions Demand Extreme Responses (tie)
12. Wormrot-Abuse (tie)
10. Assuck-Misery Index
9. Brutal Truth-Need to Control
8. 324- Boutoku no Taiyo
7. Pig Destroyer-Prowler in the Yard
6. Napalm Death-Scum
5. Terrorizer-World Downfall
4. Insect Warfare-World Extermination
3. Assuck-Anticapital

You could put together a pretty damn good grind collection using that as a template.
So with that trip down memory lane behind us, let's get down to business. It call came down to two albums, Repulsion's genre-defining (literally!) Horrified and Discordance Axis' new millennium game changer The Inalienable Dreamless. Would you go with tradition and nod back to the festering zombie that started it all or would you crown an anime-core classic as the greatest grind that ever ground?
C'mon. With my readership? We all know where this is going. The Inalienable Dreamless swept to a commanding 22-11 win, doubling up on Horrified to take the title as the single greatest grind album ever as chosen by you, my intelligent, charismatic, wise, dexterous, strong and ... ummm.... constitutional readers (D&D Second Edition 4 Lyfe, bitches!). I hope you can live with your choice.
Thank you everyone for participating. Until next year.

Grindcore Bracketology 3: The Whole Enchilada

Mmmmm...tastes like burning.

So this is what three months of planning and voting and debating have led up to. Two albums enter. One albums leaves. Thunderdome. You've cast your votes, you've left me with innumerable ties to break, but no more. This is it. This is for all the grindcore marbles. This week we decide the greatest grind album of all time by that most scientific of methods: the anonymous internet poll of self-selected readers of one obscure blog. I don't see how anyone will ever be able to dispute the validity of your choice. Because if there's one thing the internet is known for it, it's amicably reaching a decision after rational debate.

Here's how the penultimate week's matchups went down.

THE GEEZERS
Assuck started off strong, but we're talking about Horrified here. Repulsion are one of the foundational bands. They may have been milking one album for 30 years, but that's a pretty damn good one. Horrified advances by a vote of 19-17.

THE UPSTARTS
I wouldn't have faulted you for voting for Insect Warfare in this one (and for a while there it looked like an upset was in the offing), but The Inalienable Dreamless kept its perch at the top of the heap by 21-16.

So that brings us to the final battle in our little farce. The best of the oldies up against the greatest album the new generation has produced to date. As always, voting is open until Sunday either here or at the Facebook page.
I give you your final battle:

Repulsion-Horrified v. Discordance Axis-The Inalienable Dreamless

Grindcore Bracketology: Round Four

Ok. Now I know you guys are just fucking with me. Are you guys getting together somewhere and conspiring to deadlock your votes? I blog my fingers to the bones for you ingrates and this is how you thank me? Are you trying to make me prematurely gray(er)? Three weeks in a row with a tie. Same category too. Once again, I must employ the wisdom of Solomon. Or flip a coin. Whatever.
Here's how it all went down in round three.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
Unlucky number 13 a piece for both Repulsion and Terrorizer. Clearly you people couldn't make up your mind and I'm torn on this one too. I probably enjoy Terrorizer more, but cmon, none of us would be here without Horrified. So Repulsion wins by one rotting maggot in a coffin.

More Punk
Scum is probably the first grind record worthy of the term grindcore, but that apparently only takes it so far in your affection. Assuck's Anticapital snuck past Napalm Death by 14-12.

THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
This is the one I thought would probably be the toughest call but despite a vocal contingent singing the praises of Prowler in the Yard, The Inalienable Fucking Dreamless cruised to a comfortable 16-11 victory.

More Farty
No contest here. Insect Warfare's World Extermination crushed poor 324 by a commanding 23-3.

So we are at the penultimate week of voting and it's time to decide the greatest of the Geezers and the freshest of the Upstarts. As always, voting is open until Sunday here or at the Facebook page. May the best band win.

THE GEEZERS
Repulsion-Horrified v. Assuck-Anticapital

THE UPSTARTS
Discordance Axis-The Inalienable Dreamless v. Insect Warfare-World Extermination

Grindcore Bracketology 3: Round Three

Not content with a deadlocked ending last week, you had to go and do it again. Good job, guys. This is why we can't have nice things. So for the second week in a row I was forced to employ my dictatorial powers to call the victor. Who did I just condemn to perdition? Read on.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
Once again the more metal category gave you fits with Terrorizer's World Downfall and Brutal Truth's Need to Control knotted up at 10 a side. So by the power vested in me by the state of insanity, I'm advancing Terrorizer to the next round. Plus, I'm afraid Gamefaced would beat me up if they lost.

More Punk
Assuck (anti)capitalized on their opportunity to bump Brutal Truth out of the running, squeaking past Extreme Conditions Demand Extreme Responses by 11-9.

THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
Dephosphorus put out a beast of a record with Night Sky Transform, but who are we kidding? It's up against Prowler in the Yard. Pig Destroyer took a decisive 18-2 win.

More Farty
In the battle of Asia experience triumphed over youthful energy as 324 snuck past Wormrot by 11-9.

So that brings us to the end of the initial rounds and the updated brackets are available for your viewing pleasure here. Now it's time to get serious. It's time to decide who's the most metal, who's the artiest, who's the fartiest. Who will triumph in each category? As always, you have until Sunday and you can vote here or at the Facebook page.

THE GEEZERS
 
The Most Metal
1. Repulsion-Horrified v. 3. Terrorizer-World Downfall

The Punkiest
1. Napalm Death-Scum v. 5. Assuck-Anticapital

THE UPSTARTS

The Artiest
1. Discordance Axis-The Inalienable Dreamless v. 2. Pig Destroyer-Prowler in the Yard

The Fartiest
1. Insect Warfare-World Extermination v. 5. 324-Boutoku no Taiyo

Grindcore Bracketology 3: Round Two Part Two

Well this is a fine predicament you people left me in to start off round two. A tie. Who's all knotted up and how have I resolved it? Read on.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
You guys split dead even at 12 apiece for Repulsion's Horrified and Assuck's Misery Index. So I will employ my dictatorial powers to call this one. As your benevolent(ish) dictator, I hand the victory to Horrified. Not only is it widely viewed as the first true grind record, but my decision was all the easier knowing that Assuck still live to fight another day with Anticapital still in contention.

More Punk
Though the early voting suggested we'd get a pretty stunning upset, Napalm Death and Scum gutted it out with a late surge to roar past Disrupt's Unrest by 17-6.

THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
No matter who loses, Jon Chang wins this one. You guys decided The Inalienable Dreamless is a better record than Amber Gray by a pretty comfortable 19-4 margin.

More Farty
Another no brainer, Insect Warfare's World Extermination declared war with Kill the Client's grindcore, squashing Cleptocracy by 20-3.

So that's the first half of round two. Before we move on, you can peruse the standings here. So let's get to the second half. As always, vote here or at the Facebook page. Once again, you've got until Sunday to make your thoughts know.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
3. Terrorizer-World Downfall v. 4. Brutal Truth-Need to Control


More Punk
2. Brutal Truth-Extreme Conditions Demand Extreme Responses v. 5. Assuck-Anticapital


THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
2. Pig Destroyer-Prowler in the Yard v. 4. Dephosphorus-Night Sky Transform

More Farty
2. Wormrot-Abuse v. 5. 324-Boutoku no Taiyo

Grindcore Bracketology 3: The Start of Round Two

Ok, we started with 32 classic albums from all of grindcore's eras and now we're down to the Sweet Sixteen. Round One is over and the bands have been reseeded. The matchups only get uglier from this point on. You guys did a great job because there's some absolutely fascinating pairings coming your way in the very near future. Who's going to rise to the top of the fray?

Meanwhile, here's how round one came crashing to an end.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
Brutal Truth left Carcass to Reek of Putrefaction because the New York grind freaks Need to Control everything around them, rising by a vote of 11-7.

More Punk
This one surprised the hell out of me. I had Siege picked as a contender to win it all but they dropped dead in the face of Assuck's anticapitalist sentiments, 11-8.

THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
Night Sky Transform is barely a year old, but Dephosphorus upset one of my favorite grind albums ever, Agoraphobic Nosebleed's transformative Altered States of America, by 10-8.

More Farty
Japan's crustcore deities 324 pulled it out in squeaker. Boutoku no Taiyo edged past Suffering Mind's eponymous effort by 9-8.

So with all of that in the bag, the matchups and been reseeded and here's how Round Two is going to play out. Check it all out here.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
1. Repulsion-Horrified v. 7. Assuck-Misery Index
3. Terrorizer-World Downfall v. 4. Brutal Truth-Need to Control

More Punk
1. Napalm Death-Scum v. 6. Disrupt-Unrest
2. Brutal Truth-Extreme Conditions Demand Extreme Responses v. 5. Assuck-Anticapital


THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
1. Discordance Axis-The Inalienable Dreamless v. 6. GridLink-Amber Gray (That's right you picked between Matsubara projects only to get stuck with Chang on Chang)
2. Pig Destroyer-Prowler in the Yard v. 4. Dephosphorus-Night Sky Transform

More Farty
1. Insect Warfare-World Extermination v. 6. Kill the Client-Cleptocracy
2. Wormrot-Abuse v. 324-Boutoku no Taiyo


So all of that is prologue to this week's matchups. Once again, you have until Sunday. Vote here or at the Facebook page. Have at it.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
1. Repulsion-Horrified v. 7. Assuck-Misery Index

More Punk
1. Napalm Death-Scum v. 6. Disrupt-Unrest

THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
1. Discordance Axis-The Inalienable Dreamless v. 6. GridLink-Amber Gray

More Farty
1. Insect Warfare-World Extermination v. 6. Kill the Client-Cleptocracy

Grindcore Bracketology 3: The 4-5 Matchups

Despite Jon Chang's laughably desperate attempt to stuff the ballot box by voting twice, some of his favorite records just got torched. I call that justice. Everyone savor the tears of his failure. Which sons of bitches met their mortality? Read on.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
S.O.B.'s Gate of Doom met its World Downfall at the hands of Terrorizer, falling by 16-2 (and I only counted one of Jon's votes).

More Punk
Disrupt disrupted S.O.B.'s second entry in the contest when Unrest stomped all over Don't Be Swindle by 13-5.


THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
No matter who goes down, Takafumi Matsubara won this round, and you guys decided GridLink's Amber Gray was superior to Mortalized's Absolute Mortality 2 by 14-4.

More Farty
Kill the Client's Cleptocracy stole the show, outlasting Agoraphobic Nosebleed's PCP Torpedo by 9-6.

As always, the updated brackets are available for your perusal here.
So that brings us to the last batch for the first round. Here are the 4-5 matchups. As always, you have until Sunday to vote either here or at the Facebook page, whichever suits you. Just a friendly reminder, you only get to vote once (*cough*Chang*cough).

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
4. Brutal Truth-Need to Control v. 5. Carcass-Reek of Putrefaction

More Punk
4. Siege-Drop Dead v. 5. Assuck-Anticapital


THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
4. Dephosphorus-Night Sky Transform v. 5. Agoraphobic Nosebleed-Altered States of America

More Farty
4. Suffering Mind-Suffering Mind v. 5. 324-Boutoku no Taiyo

Grindcore Bracketology 3: The 3-6 Matchups

Round two brought us the first upset and it kinda surprises me. (In retrospect, maybe not so much.) Who got unceremoniously dumped? Let's get to the results.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
Napalm Death's From Enslavement just got obliterated by Assuck's Misery Index. What many consider to the be the most influential grind albums in history got smoked 14-9.

More Punk
This one wasn't even close. Unseen Terror's Human Error mustered a single protest vote, losing to Brutal Truth's Extreme Conditions Demand Extreme Responses by 21-1.

THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
Even the mighty Nasum couldn't stand against Pig Destroyer as Prowler in the Yard trounced Helvete by 15-7.

More Farty
Sakatat gave us eight blissful minutes of grind perfection with farewell album Bir Devrin Sonu, but that wasn't enough to come close to Singaporean masters Wormrot and their totally out of left field debut Abuse, which triumphed 19-2.

So that was round two. As always, you can view the updated brackets here. Just keep in mind I'll be reseeding when the first batch is done, so the matchups it shows right now might not be the final faceoffs.

Anyway, on to the 3-6 matchups.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
3. Terrorizer-World Downfall v. 6. S.O.B.-Gate of Doom

More Punk
3. S.O.B.-Don't Be Swindle v. 6. Disrupt-Unrest


THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
3. Mortalized-Absolute Mortality 2 v. 6. GridLink-Amber Gray (ya think I did that deliberately?)

More Farty
3. Agoraphobic Nosebleed-PCP Torpedo v. 6. Kill the Client-Cleptocracy

Have at it. Once again, you have until Sunday. You can vote here or at the Facebook page, whichever is most convenient.

Grindcore Bracketology 3: The 2-7 Matchups

Round one is in the books, folks. I don't think there were any surprises with this one, but here's who will be hitting the showers early.

I don't  think any serious grind fan will discount just how awesome and quietly underrated Enemy Soil's Casualties of Progress is, but Horrified is a grindcore cornerstone. Repulsion trounced them 20-4.

In a matchup of early punky grind, Napalm Death's Scum ran all over Extreme Noise Terror's A Holocaust in Your Head by 19-5.

We all appreciate what Matt Widener did with Liberteer, but cmon, Discordance Axis' The Inalienable Dreamless is The Inalienable Fucking Dreamless. (I'm kinda a fan of this record). This one wasn't even close at 22-3.

Finally, I was curious how this one would go down since I juiced the rankings to force proteges Cellgraft to square off against masters Insect Warfare. I thought this might be the best chance for a spoiler, but I underestimated your love of World Extermination, which stomped all over External Habitation by 22-2.

So that was round one. You can keep tabs on how the brackets are shaking out here. Meanwhile, here are your 2-7 matchups. Once again, you have until Sunday. You can vote here or at the Facebook page. Have at it.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
2. Napalm Death-From Enslavement to Obliteration v. 7. Assuck-Misery Index

More Punk
2. Brutal Truth-Extreme Conditions Demand Extreme Responses v. 7. Unseen Terror-Human Error


THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
2. Pig Destroyer-Prowler in the Yard v. 7. Nasum-Helvete

More Farty
2. Womrot-Abuse v. 7. Sakatat-Bir Devrin Sonu

Grindcore Bracketology 3: The 1-8 Matchups

There must be something about news of a new Squash Bowels album that does it to me because I have the flu yet again. But I won't let a little thing like leaking from orifices I never knew existed stop me from kicking off this year's bracketology. You'll just have to forgive me if I keep it short and sweet.
Here are the 1-8 matchups. You have until Sunday to vote here or at the Facebook page. Have at it.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
1. Repulsion-Horrified v. 8. Enemy Soil-Casualties of Progress


More Punk
1. Napalm Death-Scum v. 8. Extreme Noise Terror-A Holocaust in Your Head

THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
1. Discordance Axis-The Inalienable Dreamless v. 8. Liberteer-Better to Die on Your Feet Than Live on Your Knees

More Farty
1. Insect Warfare-World Extermination v. 8. Cellgraft-External Habitation

Grindcore Bracketology 3: Master Blasters

I asked you on the Facebook page if you're up for yet another round of bracketology, and you all seemed most enthusiastic about pitting your favorite grind albums of all time against each other in a musical Hunger Games. So here's Grindcore Bracketology 3: 32 albums enter, only one blaster gets to run Bartertown.
For those of you who missed out on the last two years, here's how it goes down. I've broken the albums down into four conferences of eight albums each. Just like in the hockey playoffs, the eighth ranked album has to face the first ranked album while the others are paired up 2-7, 3-6, and 4-5.  For the visually-minded, you can view the brackets here.
You vote for your favorite in each match up and the winners get to fight another day.
One important change this year: I'm opening up voting both here and at the Facebook page. Vote where ever is most convenient for you. You're on the honor system to vote only once, but I know most of your real names so I'll keep you honest.
Before we kick off the voting next week, here is your chance to nitpick my set up. Feel free to offer suggestions about reordering the initial matchups or adding or deleting albums before we get started. I've organized the albums into two leagues: The Geezers (representing the classic first and second wave records) and The Upstarts (the modern classics). Within each league I've created two conferences. For the Geezers, I've (very roughly, here) broken out albums that seem to have more of a metallic base versus those that seem more directly tied to punk and hardcore. Over on the Upstarts side, I'm pitting your arty pretentious types with their weepy songs and carefully cultivated angst against the knuckle-dragging troglodytes who like to pick their nose and kick your ass without over-thinking it.
Voting will start next week. May the best record win.

THE GEEZERS

More Metal
1. Repulsion-Horrified
2. Napalm Death-From Enslavement to Obliteration
3. Terrorizer-World Downfall
4. Brutal Truth- Need to Control
5. Carcass-Reek of Putrefaction
6. S.O.B.-Gate of Doom
7. Assuck-Misery Index
8. Enemy Soil-Casualties of Progress

More Punk
1. Napalm Death-Scum
2. Brutal Truth- Extreme Conditions Demand Extreme Responses
3. S.O.B.-Don't Be Swindle
4. Siege-Drop Dead
5. Assuck-Anticapital
6. Disrupt-Unrest
7. Unseen Terror-Human Error
8. Anal Cunt-Morbid Florist
Extreme Noise Terror-A Holocaust in Your Head


THE UPSTARTS

More Arty
1. Discordance Axis-The Inalienable Dreamless
2. Pig Destroyer-Prowler in the Yard
3. Mortalized-Absolute Mortality 2
4. Dephosphorus-Night Sky Transform
5. Agoraphobic Nosebleed-Altered States of America
6. GridLink-Amber Gray
7. Nasum-Helvete
8. Liberteer-Better to Die on Your Feet Than Live on Your Knees

More Farty
1. Insect Warfare-World Extermination
2. Wormrot-Abuse
3.  Agoraphobic Nosebleed-PCP Torpedo
4. Nasum-Human 2.0
Suffering Mind-Suffering Mind
5. 324-Boutoku no Taiyo
6. Kill the Client-Cleptocracy
7. Sakatat-Bir Devrin Sonu
8. Cellgraft-External Habitation

Grindcore Bracketology 2: Goalllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll!

You have no idea how much this picture pains me.

I'm going to go ahead and give you a hint. The winner's initials are S.H. Not much help, I know.
But before we get to the grand unveiling and crown the prom king and queen of Grindcore High's class of 2012, we need to look back at how we got here.
We started with 32 guitarists, selected by me (modified by many of you who were not slow to correct my oversights). Here's who's been left on the wayside already, as voted by you.

28. (tie) Pindgum (Total Fucking Destruction)
28. (tie) G. Toshimi (S.O.B.)
28. (tie) Chris Richardson (Kill the Client)
28. (tie) Ryan Unks/Paul Nowoczynski (Creation is Crucifixion)
28. (tie) Mika Aalto (Rotten Sound)
26. (tie) Ryan Page (Body Hammer/Robocop)
26. (tie) Mitch Dickenson (Heresy/Unseen Terror)
23. (tie) Marissa Martinez (Cretin)
23. (tie) Shinji (324)
23. (tie) Kurt Habelt (Siege)
19. (tie) Kapo (Swarrrm)
19. (tie) Mitch Harris (Napalm Death/Righteous Pigs/Defecation)
19. (tie) Mieszko Talarczyk (Nasum)
19. (tie) Sebastian Rokicki (Antigama)
17. (tie) Rob Marton (Discordance Axis)
17. (tie) Eduardo Borja (Maruta)
16. Chris Arp (Psyopus)
15. Richard Johnson (Enemy Soil/Drugs of Faith)
14. Steve Burda/Shane McLachlan (Phobia)
13. Rasyid (Wormrot)
11. (tie) Dorian Rainwater (Noisear/Kill the Client)
11. (tie) Matt Olivo/Aaron Freeman (Repulsion
9. (tie) Steve Procopio/Jim Baglino (Human Remains)
9. (tie) Bill Steer (Carcass/Napalm Death)
8. Papirmollen (Parlamentarisk Sodomi/PSUDOKU)
7. Erik Burke (Lethargy/Brutal Truth/Sulaco)
6. Beau Beasley (Insect Warfare)
5. Jesse Pintado (Terrorizer/Napalm Death/Resistant Culture)
3. (tie) Brent "Gurn" McCarty (Brutal Truth)
3. (tie)Takafumi Matsubara (Mortalized/GridLink/Haiyano Daisuki)

So that's how the last three months have shaken out, as decided by you, my not-so-loyal minions. (Rob Marton is 17? Really? Mieszko Talarczyk is only 19? C'mon people! Don't make me come down there.) But I have resolved to forgive your apostasy. Thank you to everyone who has participated. You all are the ones who make all this possible. I hope you've enjoyed the process.
So you the voters have spoken and the greatest grind guitarist is...

Unholy Grave!

That's right. They overcame the fact that they weren't even included to win it all in a stunning come from behind victory.
Sorry. Couldn't resist pulling that one out. Again.

But seriously now. We're down to Steve Heritage of Assuck and Scott Hull of Agoraphobic Nosebleed, Pig Destroyer and Anal Cunt.


After carefully tallying your votes and tossing out some obvious trolling by the French judges, the best guitarist in grindcore is:

A TIE!

I shit you not. Though Scott Hull led through most of the voting, Steve Heritage mounted a last minute insurgency and managed to knot it all up at 12 votes a piece. So what should we do now? I have no clue. Would an extra week of voting settle this? Should I flip a coin? Rock, paper, scissors? Or all you all cool just to leave it as is? Personally, I like it. It speaks to the different impulses that drive grind and keep it vital, the past and the future knotted up together.
You make the call. Meanwhile, please enjoy the after party in the Jan Frederickx Memorial Cocktail Lounge.

Grindcore Bracketology 2: There Can Be Only One

One week from now we will award the Stanley Cup of grindcore: the oh-so-coveted G&P Grindy, famed in story and song. One man will be crowned the best guitarist to ever ride a blastbeat with whatever bragging rights come with winning a totally arbitrary popularity poll on the internet. I cannot overstate the honor involved.
But first we have to explain how we got here.

The Old Guard v. The Innovators
Brutal Truth's Gurn was a brilliant guitarist who left an indelible mark on grindcore's transitional phase from the first wave of innovators through what we all know and love today. But with all of that gussying up his C.V., Gurn was no match for multi-band modern phenom Scott Hull who powered to a convincing 10-5 win on the strength of his varied body of work.

The Punks v. The Technicians
While we all agree that Takafumi Matsubara is one of the most ridiculously talented musicians to ever pick up a guitar, the Japanese auteur's work did not stand up against Steve Heritage's punked out playing, which is about a subtle as a jab to the nads. The Assuck mainstay moves on by 11-5.

Which brings us to the end of the line: Two men enter. One man leaves. Thunderdome. Both Hull and Heritage, seeded number two in their respective brackets, have advanced to this final round. Only one can claim the title of king of the grindcore guitarists. You've got until Sunday to argue your case.

Scott Hull (Agoraphobic Nosebleed/Pig Destroyer/A.C.)

vs.

Steve Heritage (Assuck)

Grindcore Bracketology 2: The Fantastic Four

Things got worrisome there for a minute. We looked to be heading for another tie, but a last minute vote (seriously, eight minutes before midnight) broke the deadlock, forcing me to rewrite this whole post. But at least we can move on to Round 4. We started with 32, but only four guitarists are still standing. Here's how it broke down.

The Old Guard
The brutal truth? Pintado went down in a squeaker. A last minute vote broke the tie as Gurn ground it out 11-10.
Gurn is the best of The Old Guard.

The Innovators
Not even close. Hull trounced Papirmollen by 19-1.
Hull is the best of The Innovators.

The Punks
The forces of past vs. present were pretty evenly arrayed, but Heritage triumphed by 12-8.
Heritage is the best of The Punks.
The Technicians
Even the people who voted for Burke admitted it was a futile protest. Matsubara winds handily 15-5.
Matsubara is the best of The Technicians.

As we winnow the field further, Round 4 will be Old Guard vs. Innovators and Punks vs. Technicians. You can check out the updated brackets here. As always, the door slams shut on comments on Sunday. Let the best man win.

The Old Guard v. The Innovators
Gurn (Brutal Truth) v. Hull (ANb/Pig Destroyer/Anal Cunt)
Extreme grindcore demanded an extreme guitarist. The other altered the state of grindcore. Who has contributed more?

The Punks v. The Technicians
Heritage (Assuck) v. Matsubara (GridLink/Mortalized/Hayaino Daisuki)
Do you prefer your grind stripped down and bare to the bone or intricately layered with endless fractal depths to explore?

Grindcore Bracketology 2: Round 3

Round two creaks to a close, but this batch of matchups hardly seemed to phase you. This was one of the more lopsided lots of the whole shebang. Hopefully the choices get harder as we whittle away the chaff.

The Old Guard
The closest of the lot, but Gurn's extreme riffing demanded an extreme showdown as he snuck past Steer by 7-6.

The Innovators
You guys sent the Grindfather to the leaky, moldy retirement home with nary a look a back as you advanced Hull by a commanding 12-1 edge.

The Punks
You didn't look back in anger. You looked back in love, paying tribute to grindcore's past while telling grindcore's present to patiently bide its time. Heritage advances past Rasyid by 8-4.

The Technicians
No contest Burke ran the table with a perfect 11-0.


Shit is about to get serious now. Check out these brackets. These are the kinds of debates that ruin friendships and end marriages. This next round will determine who is king of each category. The clock stops on Sunday.

The Old Guard
3. Gurn (Brutal Truth) v. 4. Pintado (Terrorizer/Napalm Death/Resistant Culture)
Gurn and Pintado both picked up the thread from the first two Napalm Death records and pushed the grindcore formula forward to keep it from going stale at birth. Who gets to be king of them all?

The Innovators
2. Hull (ANb/Pig Destroyer/A.C.) v. 6. Papirmollen (Parlamentarisk Sodomi/PSUDOKU)
Two guys who relentlessly push themselves beyond grindcore convention with every project they undertake. Who does it better?

The Punks
2. Heritage (Assuck) v. 6. Beau (Insect Warfare)
This is a fascinating matchup. You'd arguably probably not have an Insect Warfare without an Assuck. But who best embodies that punk spirit that animates grind?

The Technicians
1. Matsubara (Mortalized/GridLink/Hayaino Daisuki) v. 3. Burke (Lethargy/Sulaco/Brutal Truth)
Two consummate musicians who never let technique get in the way of writing a good song. Which fretboard magician will rise above them all?

Grindcore Bracketology 2: Round 2 Week 2

Round two kicked off with the rise of the underdogs...to a certain extent. Here's who you say will be moving on.

The Old Guard
Repulsion have been riding one damn good album for decades now, and apparently that isn't enough to compete with Jesse Pintado's plethora of outfits over the years. The J-man squeaked out the grave robbers by 9-5.

The Innovators
Human Remains were grindcore prophets of the new flesh, but we live in a transhuman era and Papirmollen is the acolyte of extraterrestrial grind. The Norwegian prodigy advances by a vote of 8-6.

The Punks
Phobia are a grindcore institution who seem to be on the upswing after a pretty fallow middle frame, but they still got scorched by Insect Warfare's Beau by 12-2.

The Technicians
And here's where the underdogs' momentum came slamming to a halt. Rob Marton's untimely demise at the hands of Rainwater is avenged as the Noisear noodler got served by the tentacle rape tuneage of Mastsubara by a commanding 9-5.

The brackets have been updated and the visually minded them can peruse them here. Meanwhile, it's time to get down to the second half of Round Two. Arguments close on Sunday.

The Old Guard
2. Steer (Carcass/Napalm Death) v. 3. Gurn (Brutal Truth)
Can Steer drive Gurn from enslavement to obliteration or is he about to face a brutal truth?

The Innovators
2. Hull (ANb/Pig Destroyer/Anal Cunt) v. 4. Johnson (Enemy Soil/Drugs of Faith)
Two drum machine innovators who have plenty of other tricks in their tool boxes. Only one gets to move forward.

The Punks
2. Heritage (Assuck) v. 5. Rasyid (Wormrot)
I don't envy you here. Assuck represent the best of grind's past, but Wormrot are the future. Who's more important?

The Technicians
3. Burke (Lethargy/Sulaco/Brutal Truth) v. 5. Arp. (Psyopus)
Arp may be the most technically adroit of all these fretboard wizards, but does his work stand up against one of the great grind innovators in Burke?

Grindcore Bracketology 2: Week 4 Clusterfuck Bonus Round

The first round should be over now. But nooooooooooooo Chaosphere got his/her/its/their votes in under the wire and had to fuck it up. For the first time in Grindcore Bracketology history we have not one but two ties. This is why we can't have nice things.
Here's how it went down.

The Old Guard
Pintado sieged Habelt's power in this round, causing the Siege guitarist's world downfall (I apologize for that whole sentence) by 13-3.

The Innovators
You guys deadlocked between Johnson's consistent history of grind innovation and Borja's promise of continued evolution by 7-7.

The Punks
Rotten Sound placed two overall last time we did this. Guitarist Aalto won't even make it out of the first round, squashed by Rasyid by a perfect 16-0.

The Technicians
In the least popular matchup of the lot, Antigama's Rokicki and Psyopus' Arp got all stranglefucked together at 5-5.

So that means we can't move on to the next round because I can't reseed the matchups. Ergo, we enter the lightning round. Once again our contestants are:

The Innovators: Johnson (Enemy Soil/Drugs of Faith) v. Borja (Maruta)

The Technicians: Rokicki (Antigama) v. Arp (Psyopus)

This week's challenge is to go back over the comments from the last round and tell me who most convincingly argued their case in these two matchups. I'll pick the two best arguments and those people's picks will move on. May the best argument win. Once again you've got until Sunday. Don't fuck this up too.

Grindcore Bracketology 2: Week 3 Results/The 4-5 Matchups

I'm sorry to tell you all, but every single vote you've cast so far has been completely wasted. We're going to have to start over completely from the beginning because we all missed one guitarist who will run away with the whole competition. I don't know how we missed her in the beginning, but bow before your queen.


8-Year-Old Guitarist Makes Us All Look Bad - Watch More Funny Videos

While you sit there looking ashamed over your inability to remember the complex chord progression of "You Suffer," here's the 3-6 results.

The Old Guard
Gurn ran away with it, squashing Toshimi a perfect 10-0.

The Innovators
We're all going to infinity and beyond with space grinder Papirmollen, who edged out Talarczyk 7-5.

The Punks
No contest, Insect Warfare's Beau ran the table against Kill the Client's Richardson 12-0.

The Technicians
Another blowout with Erik Burke taking a 9-0 lead over the Creation is Crucifixion dudes.


So, we're moving on. As always you can check out the updated bracket here. Meanwhile, here's the last batch from round one, on to the 4-5s.

The Old Guard
4. Pintado (Terrorizer/Napalm Death/Resistant Culture) v. 5. Habelt (Siege)
Habelt had no clue he was inventing grindcore with Siege. Pintado helped perfect it over the next two decades.

The Innovators
4. Johnson (Enemy Soil/Drugs of Faith) v. 5. Borja (Maruta)
I've said this a lot, but Richardson has done a buttload to drag grind kicking and screaming into the future with drum machines and grindcore swing. Borja invented an instantly recognizable guitar tone that perfectly encapsulates grindcore's grizzly edge.

The Punks
4. Aalto (Rotten Sound) v. 5. Rasyid (Wormrot)
Finland and its Scandinavian kin represented the best grindcore had to offer during the first decade of the century. The next decade belongs to Southeast Asia. Who rules right now?

The Technicians
4. Rokicki (Antigama) v. 5. Arp (Psyopus)
I don't have the foundation in advanced chaos mathematics to keep up with either of these guitarists, but I recognize the insane talent involved.

As always, you've got until Sunday to make your best arguments.

Grindcore Bracketology 2: Week 2 Results/The 3-6 Matchups

I'm just gonna go ahead and say up front that I hate all of you. Every last one of you ingrate bastards. I know I deliberately rigged this round to have some of the most interesting head to heads. But damn, people. Seriously? Let's see if you can figure out why I'm so speechless.

Here's the 2-7 results:

The Old Guard
Though the anti-Carcass crowd came on strong early, Bill Steer ultimately triumphed over Mick Harris 10-5.

The Innovators
No surprise that Scott Hull got the first shut out of the competition, blowing out Pingdum with a perfect 15-0.

The Punks
324's Shinji now rates a 12-3 on the Misery Index after getting stomped by Heritage.

The Technicians
Rainwater by 8-7 over Marton.



Anyway, the updated brackets can be viewed here.
So, on to the 3-6 matchups. Not that you deserve them. As always, you've got until Sunday.

The Old Guard
3. Gurn (Brutal Truth) v. 6. Toshimi (S.O.B.)
Drug crazed grind freak v. sabotaged organized barbarian.

The Innovators
3. Talarczyk (Nasum) v. 6. Papirmollen (Parlamentarisk Sodomi/PSUDOKU)
A Scandinavian smackdown between the patron saint of modern grind and Norway's master of both cornholes and wormholes.

The Punks
3. Richardson (Kill the Client) v. 6. Beau (Insect Warfare)
Who is king of all Texas? This may be more divisive than the outcome of the Alamo.

The Technicians
3. Burke (Lethargy/Sulaco/Brutal Truth) v. 6. Unks/Nowoczynski (Creation is Crucifixion)
Burke has been tearing shit with little fanfare for 20 years. Creation is Crucifixion were 20 years ahead of their time.

Grindcore Bracketology 2: Week 1 Results/The 2-7 Matchups

Ok, so, class, what did we learn from the first week of voting?

The Old Guard
We learned the ratio of people who love grind and people who love Repulsion is essentially 1:1. The Michigan gravediggers win handily 10-1.

The Innovators
In a squeaker, Human Remains triumphed 6-5. You did your damnedest, Strife. You almost got Kapo over the hump.

The Punks
I was already worried about the gender disparity at work before we started, but now the only chick in the contest is already out as Phobia beat Cretin 7-3.

The Technicians
I don't think anybody is surprised Matsubara triumphed so easily. Even Page, good guy that he is, voted against himself. Japan's finest won 11-1.

As always, the updated brackets are available here.

So that sets us up for the 2-7 matchups. Here's this week's head to head. Once again, you've got until Sunday to argue your side.

The Old Guard
2. Steer (Carcass/Napalm Death) v. 7. Harris (Righteous Pigs/Defecation/Napalm Death)
Two Napalmers square off head to head. Each also has a significant repertoire outside of grind's first family. Who does it better?

The Innovators
2. Hull (ANb/Pig Destroyer/Anal Cunt) v. 7. Pingdum (Total Fucking Destruction)
Drum machines, nightmares and gay jokes. There's not much Hull hasn't riffed over. Flipside, Pingdum is the ringmaster of weird who gives substance and direction to the daydreams Hoak deems out of bonds for Brutal Truth.

The Punks
2. Heritage (Assuck) v. 7. Shinji (324)
Good ol' American ass beating squares off against a uniquely Japanese take on crustcore.

The Technicians
2. Marton (Discordance Axis) v. 7. Rainwater (Noisear/Kill the Client)
Will Marton grind forever alone as the best guitarist of the bunch or has an upstart weaned on his works overtaken the master?